Disclaimer: All recognizable characters are property of Marvel Comics.
For entertainment purposes only; no copyright infringement is intended.
The situation itself, however, is based on my own family and its many
gatherings.
Enjoy!
So Hungry
by Hoodoo
It was almost six o'clock. Bobby clamped a hand over his grumbling
stomach.
"I'm starving! When are we eating tonight?"
"I think the more appropriate question is: what are we dining upon
tonight?" his blue furred companion answered.
He nodded at Hank. His stomach growled again.
As they made their way to the kitchen, other housemates joined
them. Living together not only made them a stronger team in battle, but
also gave them a close bond at mealtimes. If someone was hungry, everyone
was hungry.
Congregating in the kitchen, the entire team milled about in an
almost desperate manner.
Before anyone could say or do anything however, Professor Xavier's
hover chair floated into the already crowded room.
"So!" he said brightly, clapping his hands together. "What's on
the menu tonight?"
Ororo was rummaging through the giant refrigerator.
"There's not much here, Charles," she announced over the hushed
crowd. "I could pull together a nice salad--"
Groans. Mostly from Logan.
"--there also seems to be a multitude of, *ahem*, crawdads here--"
"Does be mine!" said Remy happily. "I be more den willin' to steam
dem up nice an' hot, Cajun style. Dey be tasty, I guaruntee!"
He was met with not encouraging faces.
"I apologize," Hank voiced with regret. "I prefer not to eat
objects whose eyes watch me as I devour them."
Jubilee was less eloquent. "Gross! I'm not sucking out their
guts!"
Remy shrugged. "Cest la vie."
The next few minutes were the same. 'Just because we're mutants,
just because we're X-men, doesn't mean we aren't like normal people,' Jean
thought. 'We can never decide what to eat.'
While Ororo was still arguing the merits of a good salad, and
Jubilee was insisting they should just get a pizza--"Come on! It's got
something for, like, everyone!--and Logan just wanted a small animal he
could stalk and devour at his leisure (Hank made sure he was well out of
Logan's reach when he whispered that to Rogue; Rogue almost spit up
laughing), and Remy kept insisting, "I guaruntee!" because he knew how
incredibly silly it sounded, Bobby's stomach complained louder than ever.
"My stomach is eating itself it's so hungry!" he whined. "You
know, I haven't had good Chinese for a while."
Instant silence.
Heads perked up.
The din returned.
"I love Chinese!"
"House of Chen, it's the best--"
"No, Chow's Village has better lo mein!"
"How fast do you think they could get here?'
"Should someone go pick it up?"
Professor Xavier roared, "Make a list!" in everyone's head, and
shut them up.
For a second.
"Okay, Ororo, you want the vegetable lo mein--"
"How many crab rangoons come in an order? Only eight? Better make
it five or six orders--"
"Who wants egg drop soup? Wonton? Okay, okay--"
The order was finally placed. It was promised to be delivered
quickly-forty minutes-and then more quickly with the promise of a bigger
tip.
Jubilee bounced from window to window in the foyer, watching. Her
piercing scream alerted the rest of the X-men--
"Here he comes!"
--to the delivery man's arrival.
He brought boxes and boxes of food. Three trips from the car were
needed to bring it all in. Scott helped him bring it to the door, and an
assembly line of hands moved the food from the foyer to the dining room.
Finally the delivery man, grateful for the help but unnerved by the
number of people declaring they were famished and snatching the boxes away
quickly, was done. Now burdened with cash instead of food, he quickly made
his exit.
In the dining room, plates, forks and little square boxes of food
were being divided.
"Everyone's responsible for their own drinks!"
"I'm making tea," Ororo stated as she made her way to the kitchen.
"Make enough for me!" called Logan after her.
A second of silence.
"You eat Chinese, you drink tea," he muttered weakly.
A burst of laughter, and the babble started again.
"Help yourself to the rice, there's plenty--"
"Who ordered the Dragon and Phoenix--Logan?"
"Nasty--this eggroll is soggy!"
"Pass a fork, please. A fork. PASS ME A FORK!"
"Geez, McCoy, don't blow a gasket--"
"Anyone want chopsticks?"
"Hey--that's my diet Coke! I already drank out of it!"
"Mmm. Crab rangoons. These are the best!"
Eventually the squabbling died away and was replaced with chewing
and the occasional stifled burp. After an extraordinarily short time, it
seemed, people began pushing themselves away from the table with a groan.
"Oh my god, I'm stuffed!"
"Don't forget the fortune cookies--"
"That's right! Read the fortune out loud, and you have to add 'in
bed' at the end. It's hilarious!"
They did, and ended up laughing so hard--Professor Xavier read,
"God has blessed you with incredible talents, in bed"--that several of the
team insisted they were going to be sick, or pee their pants, or both.
The night was so agreeable that they all made their way to the
living room together, instead of heading their separate ways. Jubilee
threw a movie into the DVD (Ghostbusters) and Logan changed it (Escape from
LA). Hank declined to play a game of cards, and picked up a book. Charles
did the same. The rest of the team broke into games of poker and Scrabble.
The camaraderie lasted an hour and a half or so, until Logan
proclaimed--
"You know what? I'm hungry."
--and the room erupted into a giant pillow fight.